Anxiety

Wow, I don't even know what to title this post, because there is way too much to try and express in such a short space.

This anxiousness all centers around baby and me. I had my 36 wk appointment on Tuesday. I was measuring small and had actually decreased instead of increasing from my appointment two weeks ago. They said it may be nothing, but that they wanted to do an ultrasound to check the baby's growth. The ultrasound results are showing the baby only weighing 4 lbs 14 ozs. Average weight at this point is 6 lbs. This low weight is in the less than 10%. This is cause for concern showing signs of IUGR - Intra Uterine Growth Restriction. The doctor said it could just be a little baby, but if they see no growth increase then they will induce at any point from here on out. At this point if it is not growing, then it would actually be better outside of the womb. They did a lot of testing with the ultrasound and everything else seems fine. The amniotic fluid, blood flow through the umbilical chord, heart rate, baby movements, were all good. The doctor wants to keep a very close eye on the baby and wants to see me twice a week until the baby is born. I go again this Friday for an NST - Non Stress Test, which is where they will monitor the baby for 30 minutes to make sure the baby's heart rate is good and that the baby is not under stress. I go again next Monday for another ultrasound. And the saga will continue with an ultrasound a week and an NST a week on two different days until I have had the baby. I am also supposed to keep a very close eye on the baby's movements in between appointments and if there is any slack I am to go to the hospital.

All of this means that I could be having my baby very soon, but I actually think I would feel better with her out at this point. I was hoping to have her earlier than my due date, but this is not what I had in mind. I had no idea when I went to the doctor today, that this is what I would learn. It was a long drawn out process with having to return to the office for the ultrasound, etc. Thank goodness Jonathan was able to be with me, because I definitely could not have done it on my own and handle Lindsey as well.

Another aspect is that my mother is at least 17 -20 hours away from me on vacation in Colorado. In my opinion, no one is quite like your Mama. Ahhhhh!! I could actually have this baby before she gets back. I discussed the distance issue with her Tuesday evening and I assured her that I was fine with her not heading for home until they said they were going to induce me. I don't want them to have to cut their trip short when it could be a dry run and not be necessary. I just may have to suffer through delivery without her and she would arrive shortly after. Such is life, I'm a BIG girl - haha!! Thank goodness for 2 of my sister-in-laws who live less than 30 minutes away and for another sister-in-law and mother-in-law that are 2 hours away.

I will keep all of you posted, but I may not have much news until after my appointment on Friday and then I might be headed to the hospital. So, I will update when I can. Also, I would love to hear some of your experiences, opinions, and or advice. I didn't go through anything like this with Lindsey and it is a bit unnerving.

p.s. Did I mention I have to get my bags packed and everything finalized for the baby in the next 48 hours - ahhhh!!! I just may not come back home after my appointment on Friday until I have had my baby. This is a very stressful thought to me since I certainly wasn't expecting to have my baby this soon. Lots to do - later!